How to Like Yourself in Reverse

I know this doesn't exactly sound like a self help article...but it's more than just the story of how I learned to hate myself...

It's also the story of how to like yourself, if you read it backwards.

And, in my opinion, it's a very valuable thing to know how to like yourself.

More valuable than I ever imagined...

I suspect that I didn't start out hating myself.

I don't remember much at that age, but I have seen very few neurotic three year olds.

Three year olds probably only know how to like themselves. That's all they ever seem to do...

So I'm making an assumption that this is something I learned later.

And I think I know how it went...

Now...before I go any further...

Let me say that my parents are wonderful people.

And they taught me what they learned from their parents who did the same thing...

And so on and so on.

And so I was taught to pay attention to what I was doing that was not working.

And boy did I get to it!

Over the years, I have built one hell of a list of my mistakes.

And since I wasn't taught to pay attention to what I was doing that was working (and really...I was very busy with the other list anyway)...

I didn't have much of a list of my successes.

But I had gotten SO good at making the list of my mistakes that I could take any success and rip it to shreds.

Being the logical people that we are, my family also taught me that you need proof of things.

Words don't mean anything without proof to back it up...but I only had proof of one thing...

My list...

And I was really good at finding that kind of proof!

So I decided that I wasn't good enough...

At anything!!

Why?

I had proof!

And by this time, the ONLY thing I noticed was my mistakes,so almost every time I tried something...

I saw what was not working...

And got discouraged.

I didn't always quit what I was working on, but I did spend a lot of time being discouraged which isn't much fun...

Not exactly how to like yourself.

It also slowed me down A LOT!

It actually took me longer to learn anything when I thought I was doing a bad job...and I often gave up before I started to realize how well I was doing...

So all this led me to the decision that I had gotten a lemon...

Me!

I was a lemon!

And I couldn't return myself for a refund or exchange...

I was stuck with myself...

After awhile...

I had a lot of:

• resentment
• anger
• and frustration

So I began to hate myself.

All because I hadn't learned how to pay attention to what I was doing well...

Now that I've learned how to do this, I have two big lists...

Although I've decided to archive the old list and focus mostly on my new list!

The growing list of my successes...

The big ones AND the little ones...because the little ones add up to really big successes eventually...faster than you think...

In fact all big successes are nothing more than an accumulation of little successes!

So go and get yourself started counting those little successes now...

And while we're on the subject of How to Like Yourself...

If you've got a question or something to say about "How to Like Yourself" or anything else, you can talk about it here...

Or just read what everyone else has said...

Or you can introduce yourself to the Thought Detective community!

And tell us a little bit about you, where you are living, how you got there or anything you'd like to tell us about yourself here...

Looking forward to hearing from you...

Suzanne

Go from "How to Like Yourself" to "Changing Bad Habits"

Go to the Thought Detective home page